Are you a Finisher, or a Perpetuator?

“Don’t start none, won’t be none.” Some of us live by this as we would an ancient proverb. Perhaps some us live by this saying unaware because it’s wrapped in the new school quote: “Don’t come for me, unless I send for you.” Those of us that subscribe to this mindset, we truly think of ourselves as well intentioned individuals. We drink our water, we mind our business. Then, BOOM. Here comes trouble knocking. Not because we asked for it, or sought it out. Yet, here it is. Super special, express delivery to your front door. Now it’s on us what to do with it.

Some may feel because this trouble went so far out of its way, we want to make its trip worthwhile. A brother at church said when he was cutting up as a child, his mom would say “You’re acting without getting paid–so let me pay you!” Some of us greet this trouble with overwhelming reception and let it know that we have just what it needs. “Don’t threaten me with a good time,”–right? Then, when our retaliation sets us back further than the trouble did itself–we want to cry about how we don’t bother anybody. We get whiny, pointing the finger at who “started” it. Why?

Well, because we didn’t start it. We were “finishing” it, right? However, our “finishing touches” only perpetuated the problem. When we add fuel to the fire, what sense does it make to complain about the heat rising? Some of us (at our big age), must begin calling a spade, a spade. Issues are finished when they are resolved, or when we agree to disagree. Doing tit-for-tat, getting your lick back, all of that is a recipe for a never ending cycle of chaos.

I would encourage us all to truly finish problems. The finisher in the situation brings the issue to a complete halt. The issue can only get bigger and grow legs if there is a perpetuator in the mix, perpetrating as a finisher. Make sure the perpetuator isn’t you. 

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