Are you advertising free, for a fee, or at a reduced cost specialty because you’re not showing up as Exalted Royalty? Or are you living with integrity and morality, consistently so he knows you’re a priority, not just a possibility to be his company? You see that’s two different ways of living.
And I don’t know about you Queen, but I know quite a few guys who have found themselves on the wrong side of the law. And they went and they stood before that judge and that judge said, Sir we are going to lock you up. And we’re going to lock you up for some years. Now, I want you to think about a man you know – And a man you know that was a straight man that got locked up for some years…
And I want you to imagine, even if you weren’t there – him being walked out of that court… Do you think that that man was thinking to himself – well, I’m going to be in jail for some years, so I’m going to have to get me a man. Do you think when he got there – wherever they placed him that he said, you know what, it’s been a while since I had a Red Light Special and some of these men are looking mighty fine, I’m have to go get me one.
If you say no, then, I want you to think about this – why is it that men can so easily sell this narrative that they must have a Red Light Special? We’re dating them. We’re not there wives. And even if we were there wives, we still get to choose whether we will or whether we won’t…
So I want you to understand these three things…
Number One – Red Light Specials don’t keep a man and they don’t sustain a relationship.
You say how you know? Well, number one, just look around at all of the children in single parent households. You, yourself, may be a single parent. And that’s no shade to any woman. Because being a single parent is not easy, especially a single black mama. It’s not easy. But, what I’m telling you is too often we’re thinking that that’s the way – that’s the key – that’s how we going to solidify a relationship and that is not the case!
We’re just ending up broken hearted and in a household with our children, by ourselves, and our children are looking at us and asking all these questions about the man who helped give them life and the men in a lot of cases does not want to be bother and does not show up as he should.
Number Two – You’re not wired like a man. I know we’re on this quest for equality. And guess what, I’m all for equality. I really am. But, the truth of the matter is men are not wired to be – typically, as emotional as us. They’re just not. They do not get emotionally attached as quickly as we do.
That’s why they could do what they do and walk away. There have been instances, many instances of people posting online… I can’t believe he did this. He just did this and that and the third and left… And I ain’t heard from him x y z… And they go on and on cuz they’re mad that this man has essentially ghosted them.
Well, he didn’t see you the way you saw him. He didn’t see the act the way that you saw it. And again that’s because men do not get emotionally attached at the same speed and rate as we do.
And lastly the choices we make communicate. See the choices you make communicate to this man integrity, respect, and your value system. So, if you don’t have integrity for yourself – if you don’t have respect for yourself – if you don’t have your value system in place and are truly living it out, then he’s going to treat you how you show up.
And you think it’s just a physical act, but it’s way much more than that.
So please be aware, please because a lot of times, like I say, we’re disrespecting ourselves. And we don’t understand why we can’t get the man to respect us. But…
~If you’re advertising free, for a fee, or at a reduced cost specialty, for the sake of a relationship, then Queen you have just told the man that you’re with that the value you bring is not worth anything and at that rate you won’t ever attract a principal man of integrity willing to give you a ring to make you his Queen.~ Coach Sam
~EXALTED ROYALTY~ A C. E. SAM COMPANY