UNTITLED DESIGN ( ) BB E

Be Your Own Peace

What a blessing it is to get to know yourself. What was I capable of actually bringing to the table? What are my dreams and aspirations? If it is not time for marriage, what is God calling me to instead? Whatever it is must be better than what I am imagining it to be!

I remember my reaction when I first heard the phrase “be his peace”.

I was taken back because it seemed to clearly and concisely explain the role I felt I held as a wife. 

I was not supposed to nag him. Bring up an issue, sure, but allow him to work through the solution in his own way and at his own speed. I wasn’t supposed to control him but allow him to lead our home – even if that meant taking the long way home. The extra time was worth keeping the peace in the home once we finally made it there. Most sarcastic comments I started keeping to myself – they weren’t encouraging or uplifting for him so why even speak them into our atmosphere.

What a blessing it is to get to know yourself. What was I capable of actually bringing to the table? What are my dreams and aspirations? If it is not time for marriage, what is God calling me to instead? Whatever it is must be better than what I am imagining it to be! What am I missing out on? What makes me tick? Do I have control of my emotions in a crisis? Can I be trusted in times of distress? How do I handle stress, anger, or feelings of anxiousness? How do I create a space of peace? Do I resolve conflict in my personal life just as seamlessly as I do in my professional life? Am I judgemental? Can I keep a private conversation private? What is my credit score? Am I able to budget a quick getaway or shopping spree? Do I make enough money to sustain the lifestyle I want for myself? If not, am I doing something about it or settling for a life of mediocrity?

There are sooo many things to consider in this journey. Are we able to recognize a negative pattern in our own lives and adjust? We hope and pray for a partner to come into our lives because we assume that everything will magically get better and fall into place. We want a God-fearing partner but is our own prayer life sustainable? Is our faith walk inspiring? We want to have children but raising little humans can be a daunting task. Do we have healthy coping mechanisms so we don’t negatively influence others? Have we healed from our own childhood trauma yet? Do we have coaches, mentors, counselors, and/or accountability partners so we don’t have to dump our ugliness on our family all the time?    

We get excited about the process of bringing peace…but do we know what that looks like? Are we familiar with peace or chaos – because whatever we are accustomed to we will default to in times of stress or discomfort. Your ‘peace’ may look different from those around you so take the time to find it, cherish it, and reach for it when dealing with life’s inevitable difficulties…you are worth your peace! You don’t have to wait for someone else to recognize your value before you experience peace. Take responsibility to explore what brings you peace and repeat when needed – it will come in handy!

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