He Is Emotionally Unstable?

Today's blog post, "Is He Emotionally Unstable?", was inspired by real life events, which made me think about how often we overlook emotional issues in people we date that have been there from the start of our relationship, because they had emotional issues before we ever met them that were never resolved. ~If it's normal for the man you're dating to have extreme and uncontrollable anger especially towards you, then you're dating and unstable man and an unstable man can't be trusted. So, you shouldn't believe he loves you. ~Coach Sam

He Is Emotionally Unstable?


Have you ever got in a fight?

A physical fight?

One in which you just lost all sense of self-control and did not care or think about the consequences of your actions?

Well, either way I asked you this, ladies, because too often we’re dating men who are emotionally unstable and then we’re wondering why the relationships are toxic.


In fact, this particular incident that comes to my mind is currently in the news in my local town. There was an incident in which a young man follows another young man, into the bathroom now, to attack him.


And it’s clear from every video angle the young man that he’s attacking is walking away and still he grabs this young man up from behind and throws him up against the wall. Now that wasn’t enough because he still didn’t walk away.


The young boy falls down to the ground and then he continues on turning this young boy into a punching bag. And I say young boy and young man interchangeably because at this particular stage they’re teenagers.


And still as young ladies we’re wondering why we’re getting men in their 20’s, 30’s and sometimes 40’s and they have this unchecked uncontrollable energy – this unchecked uncontrollable anger.


Well, it did not just get there. It’s been there and they have never worked on it. And yet we’re wondering why they can’t or refuse to treat us as the royalty that we are. Well they’ve never corrected the issue that they had as young men or young boys and they’re in lies the problems.


Because we want him to then be able to handle us in the way that he should and he’s not accustomed to checking and controlling his emotions. And so, we’re dealing with these men and not realizing we cannot help them with this issue.


They have to want the help for this issue that they have to with not being able to control their emotions and so if they don’t want to work on it, and it’s clear that they’re not trying to work on it, all we’re doing by being in a relationship with them is enabling them to continue to have somebody to abuse and beat up on.


And they may not be physically attacking you, but, still if they are verbally attacking you – if their anger is clearly uncontrollable towards you – if they are clearly showing you through their actions that hey, I have no limits in how I speak to you and how I treat you that is a problem! And it is a problem you should not ignore because they can turn very deadly very quickly because you’re dealing with somebody that’s unstable.


So when you’re dating these guys, whoever these guys are pay attention to how they handle you. Pay attention to how they handle situations, which clearly makes them angry. Because anger in itself is not bad. And I’m not going to ever tell you well, if you see somebody that’s angry that’s bad… No. Because anger is a natural emotion. In fact, all of us, even myself can tell you there has been times that I was angry.


Still, the point of it all is that we have to be able to control our emotions and not let our emotions control us. One of my mentors puts it like this – it’s fine to have emotions, it’s a whole nother thing to let them drive the car.


So, ladies – don’t play with anger! Don’t play with anger!  Because too often that puts you in a situation to where you, yourself are in danger and your safety is compromised. And you should never feel when your dating a man whoever he is that you cannot trust him because…


~If it’s normal for the man you’re dating to have extreme and uncontrollable anger especially towards you, then you’re dating and unstable man and an unstable man can’t be trusted. So, you shouldn’t believe he loves you. ~Coach Sam



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