Ladies, Are You Running Behind Your Man?

Ladies, Are You Running Behind Your Man? is my blog post asking all the ladies in relationships to think about the state of their relationship and if they are the one trying to hold and keep a relationship with someone who has clearly already checked out. ~There’s a difference in making a relationship work versus holding on to a relationship that doesn’t exist. ~ Coach Sam

I know sometimes we all endure setbacks and frustrations in our relationship and that truly is normal. However, if you’re out of a relationship more than you are in one with the same person you must ask yourself if you really have a relationship.

Translation if any man your dating has you feeling as though you’re constantly alone, then you are. While you may not want to hear that as I’ve said before you can’t have a relationship with a man when he shows you with his actions that he doesn’t want you to bother him.

Yes, I said bother. And you may be thinking ouch! But here’s the thing that’s not normal, but too many women are excepting the man they’re dating isn’t showing them interest. Too many women are allowing men to treat them as though they’re an option and then wondering why they aren’t happy.

So how do you know if you’re running behind your man

1.       You’re Constantly Checking in With Him

2.       You’re Constantly Trying to Be Where He Is

3.       You’re Constantly Begging Him to Make It Work

You’re Constantly Checking in With Him

I know you’ve heard in a relationship you have a partnership and your partner needs to know what’s going on with you. And while I do believe it’s healthy to inform your spouse of what’s going on in your day-to-day life there’s a difference in being considerate of your spouse and giving minute to minute updates on where you are and what you are doing.

You see, if you are the only one reaching out to say hey this is what’s happening in my day, this is what my plans are, this is what I was thinking about us doing tonight, etc. then what you have is a one-way dialogue with an individual who clearly doesn’t care. As anyone who cares will make the effort to not just respond when you call, but initiate calls and communication.

You’re Constantly Trying to Be Where He Is

Have you ever seen that couple who when the man gets ready to go somewhere his spouse says hold on, I’m coming too? Have you ever overheard a conversation where the man has made plans to be with his friends or family and his girlfriend found out and she’s trying to persuade him that he should include her? Or have you ever found yourself tagging along to get along?

The point of the matter is that if this is the norm in your relationship, you’re dealing with a guy who doesn’t want to be with you. As if he did you wouldn’t have to keep telling him, fussing at him, starting arguments with him, and being mad at him for not including you or inviting you to spend time with him and be apart of his life and do activities with him.

You’re Constantly Begging Him to Make It Work

Yes, I said begging him. I know you may not want to think about this. However, ladies, when you are on the phone with him, texting him over and over, or going by his house pleading your case after he has said he doesn’t want to be with you anymore you are begging him to see you as valuable.

Now, I’m not saying you shouldn’t work and commit to your relationship, but I am saying that you need to look at the situation at hand and understand your worth. You see, men are territorial and when a man cares for you and about you, he won’t repeatedly break up with you and you won’t have to beg him to make your relationship work, because he too wants it to work and will show you that through his actions.

So, what should you do if you find yourself in one of these categories – Change!!!

Your Mindset

Today’s a great day to say no more. I won’t continue belittling myself and allowing the man I date to treat me as a floormat. And that change first starts in your mind!

Your View of Him

You must change the way you see him. Don’t put your value and worth in being his girlfriend or finance. And stop fearing being alone, because you don’t need him to exist, have success, or live a fulfilled life.

Your Values for You

Because your values for you affect and effect what you accept and expect for you. It determines where and what you give your energy, time, money, and resources to. So, see your values as values that serve you and add value to you and the way you live your life.

So, I challenge you to become the person that you want to be with, so that you’re not running behind a man that sees no value in being with you because that man is not the man that’s for you!

~There’s a difference in making a relationship work versus holding on to a relationship that doesn’t exist. ~ Coach Sam


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