Preparing your Mind for Marriage

"Becoming one is not just about romance, gifts and getaways, but a time for learning each other and stretching in your faith."

“That makes me not even WANT to get married!”

As my best friend sat in the car next to me, I could see that she was struggling to understand what I was saying to her without giving up hope in relationships.

As the car windshield fogged up from our warm breath in the cold night air and my daughter’s video blared from the backseat, I said a quick silent prayer before speaking another word out loud.

I was trying to warn my best friend about the frustrating parts of marriage. I was briefly married before when I quickly found out there were some things about sharing living space, food, household budget, credit, bathrooms, vacations, vehicle maintenance, bank accounts and house guests that I was NOT prepared for!

I explained how being abstinent and living for God as a single person allows for a lot of personal growth that may be tested once you’re married. I shared with my friend that ‘becoming one’ would not be just about romance, gifts and getaways but a time for learning each other and stretching in your faith. Yes, we were excited about the idea of marriage but we had to know and understand that there would be another level of faith required to make it last.

All of a sudden, I remembered God’s Word about His peace and joy, something beyond what this world could even comprehend. I immediately knew what to add to my words of advice and said out loud to my best friend, “God’s promises are for our marriages too! We have access to His peace and His joy – even in marriage. But that also means that we have to surrender our ways in relationships to His ways and our thoughts about our spouse to His thoughts. We have to do it His way for it to work!”

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