Life is our playground. Oftentimes, we are running around wanting to get away from our true selves. You may have tried all kinds of ways to escape the feelings of not being good enough for some upcoming opportunity. People often look for a magic wand to make the empty feelings of not being good enough to go away. Maybe you go shopping to feeling better, this is known as retail therapy nowadays. Perhaps you drink a lot, or you have sex with people you don’t like much (because you want them to like you). Or perhaps you go to a tarot card reader in the hope of hearing that things will change because of fate or destiny, rather than because of your actions.
Some people keep going to different therapists, buying self-help books, going to retreats, visiting gurus and healers, going on diets or fast, or searching for a way to feel okay about themselves. I understand this – I do it too! And I am not saying that any of this is wrong in itself, but it is hard to hear the voice inside if you are always looking for your answers outside. The answers you seek are within. Sometimes, you may need assistance to silence the unbecoming chatter in your head space.
You will never rid be rid of the stuff you don’t like, but what if you learn that your flaws are beautiful and you can be friends with them? You can be perfect with all of your imperfections.
That is not to say there is anything wrong with wanting to change some behavioral patterns and seeking assistance to do so. Nor that you should not learn new ways to be and to grow. What I am saying is, there’s a difference between practicing self-care because you think you are a bad person who needs fixing and practicing self-care because you are treating yourself in a way you would treat someone that you love.
Think about why you are doing pilates or yoga, meditation or fasting, exercising or changing your diet. Be honest. Are you trying to repair something about yourself? Or can you learn to see that you are perfect as you are, with all of your flaws and your beauty? Don’t practice self-care to fix yourself, do it out of great love and respect for the person you are and the body that you live in. Do it because you deserve it! Make friends with thoughts and treat yourself as if you are your best friend.