2018 was a rough year for me. I was dealing with multiple storms at one time. That was the year God started preparing me for my purpose. It also was the year to invest in myself and learn whatever I could about self love, healthy relationships and uplifting myself.
Tony Gaskins hosted a “Self Love Retreat” in Santa Cruz, CA in late October of that year. Since I am from Oakland and Santa Cruz is only a couple of hours away from me I decided to go. I packed my clothes for the weekend and jumped in my car and drove by myself.
I decided to go because I needed to learn all I could on loving myself. I was following Tony all year long on YouTube so I thought it was a great idea.
I finally arrived at my destination which was 1440 Multiversity Place (it was a beautiful and quiet place located in the woods) it reminded me of my college days back in the late 90’s. Three days and 2 nights I was determined to open up to total strangers and pour out everything I was going through with no regrets and that is exactly what I did. I talked all weekend long which is crazy because I don’t like to talk in front of a lot of people. I am actually a very quiet person in front of crowds. I met at lot of wonderful, encouraging andositive women there.
One afternoon I went to the restroom to wash my hands before I ate lunch. And there was a message on the wall in place of where a mirror would be. I didn’t really pay attention to the wording on the wall until I left the restroom and someone asked me did I see the message on the wall. I told her no and walked back in the restroom and there staring me in the face was three words in red writing ” You look Beautiful”.
I stood in amazement. How could I miss that message . I knew the message was definitely for me. Beautiful…I definitely didn’t feel that way. I felt unloved and rejected. Beautiful…who me?
As I stood there I realized yes this is me. I am beautiful, I look beautiful, I have a beautiful personality. See what I learned during my journey is beauty is not about my outer appearance but it’s actually about the type of person I am on the inside. My character, my giving heart, my integrity, my love for God and my love for people shaped me to look Beautiful from the inside out.
Sometimes you have to realize you look beautiful even when you don’t feel that way. Hold your head up high and embrace the beauty God placed deep down inside of you and remember you look beautiful!!!